Gruh (rant)

[yukinoomoni]

Here's the thing. I don't mind being fat, in the long run. I mind occasionally when I have to fit into a swimsuit, or strip naked in front of Terry, but for the most part, I don't give a shit.

Therefore, it really gets my goat that now, when people notice I've lost a significant amount of weight due to being sick, and they tell me I look "good now", I want to ask them what the fuck that is supposed to mean, even though I know full well what it means.

It means that fat is unattractive. Fat is not nice. Fat is ugly, and if you can get rid of it through any means, you are successful. It doesn't matter if your insides are rebelling against you and the loss is a result, if you have lost that weight, you are a winner.

And I just want to say, you know what? Thanks, but no. I looked fine when I was twenty pounds - even forty pounds - overweight, and no amount of weight loss will change that. I look how I look, just with more or less padding, and telling me I "look better now" makes me wonder where the fuck you've been all of these 27 years. Why does losing weight change how I look? I look the same, only smaller. It's not like I had fucking plastic surgery. It's fat. It's not evil. And I look the exact same as I did a year ago, only now I'm a size 14 or 16 instead of an 18 or 20.

Are we that jaded by weight loss that losing some weight changes our point of views on how people look? Do twenty pounds really make that much of a difference, or is it all in our heads? I personally think it's the latter rather than the former, and while I understand it's all meant well when people say I "look better now", the fact is that I'm not - I'm sick now, and losing weight is negative - and thus I can't help but resent it.

So, okay. Am I overreacting or are we really all just afraid of fat people? Go ahead, tell me.

Comments

I have to mention that this icon isn't actually referencing you, but society

[the-flowergirl.livejournal.com]

I've been getting that too, because with my new job I've lost some weight, and people are telling me I look so pretty and thin. (I only lost maybe five pounds.) So I wasn't pretty before? What the hell. We are afraid of fat people.



The emaciated sick look is so hawt now, don't you know?

Re: I have to mention that this icon isn't actually referencing you, but society

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

Exactly. I've lost about twenty, and people are noticing with pleasure. I think along the same lines as you: What, was I hideous before? Why does weight loss make me suddenly marvelous? Grah.

Re: I have to mention that this icon isn't actually referencing you, but society

[the-flowergirl.livejournal.com]

My overweight aunt pinched my side fat a few years ago to state that I was getting too fat. (My job had changed.) I've never been more offended in my life.


To be fair, I've lost five and I've regained a lot of my muscle back, so I probably do look a bit different.

[dustwing.livejournal.com]

Hey! Sorry I've been so absent lately XP ugh.

But! I have strong feelings about this. In america we have a gigantic weight problem, but it's not just the number of overweight people...it's the discrimination. We changed the limit for what qualified as obese and then ALL OF A SUDDEN more people that were previously 'normal' were now 'overweight', and we had a 'obesity epidemic' on our hands when in fact nothing had changed from the month prior to then.

In the arts it's especially bad. Not only to people assume I am a less competent person (let alone a less competent artist) because I have a 34 to 36 inch waist, they pass those same assumptions on to drawn female characters. I ditched the thesis I wanted to do on my own IP because of this exact issue. One of the core races in my IP is genderflopped, with more traditional male fashion issues (muscles, overweight is ok, etc) applying to chicks and vice versa...aaand I knew that if I brought it into class, I'd be forced to change it. I've seen more females painted in the past six years than males, probably on a 2:1 ratio at least, and of that number I cannot recall one single fat chick that wasnt also old or a villian (Ursula from the Little Mermaid). Not one.

Honestly it seems fat has become a visual shorthand for some type of failing or character flaw- especially for chicks. Of course, individual people can deviate in mindset quite completely from the norm, but, that's the undercurrent I've seen.

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

I would have loved to see that genderflopped race. That would be so refreshing and awesome.

I really do think you got it right, here: Fat has been equated with negative qualities rather than just seen as a physical trait, when it doesn't even make sense for such a thing to happen. I don't really understand it.

[dustwing.livejournal.com]

Oh, that Ip's gonna happen ;) just...not until I have time. Planning a minicomic at some point to kick things off.

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

DO WANT.

[jacobreid.livejournal.com]

It's kind of like when people call others gay as an insult.

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

I always reply, "if it was gay, it would be much better."

[ladyhadhafang.livejournal.com]

*Hugs you* It'll be okay, dudette. Don't worry.

[caramellpwnd.livejournal.com]

man i'm in middle school and the girlsies around me are like 3 feet tall and have like 6 inch waists
and i'm pretty damn tall for my age and yeah i am a little bigger
but i still am a healthy weight like 105-110 or something? man ide remember it it ~fluctuates
and like i don't eat a lot 'specially at school and everyone's like
"oh it's very good that you're trying to lose weight i'm sure you'll look great :)"

[toomomforyou.livejournal.com]

i like your reasonning! <3

[urania-calliope.livejournal.com]

I am a dirty, dirty person:

"...or strip naked in front of Terry..."

What immediately popped into my head was: "Heh heh, I'm sure that all that was going through his mind was YIPPEE!"

[urania-calliope.livejournal.com]

And yes, we are terrified of fat people.

[resonant.livejournal.com]

Yes - aren't girls SUPPOSED to be curvy with huge boobs?

[lady-kat-pluto.livejournal.com]

I think they are!

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

Good dog, I hope so.

[pharoah999.livejournal.com]

i think your fine just the way you are! Im actually trying to gain a little more weight but i hate it when people say to me" how do you stay so thin" I mean ive always been small and im not anorexic or anything, for me i have a hard time maintaining my weight. its weird but i think its my metabolism because i usually walk alot but i don't go to a gym.

[morgeil.livejournal.com]

Speaking as a beanpole... honestly, I don't get it either. I've always been rather envious of full-figured women and considered actresses like Queen Latifa very pretty. We sticks don't get those curves. Curves would be nice.

What's really alarming is some reactions I get when I make noises about wanting to gain weight. And find the "What do you mean you want to gain weight? Fuck you, be grateful" vibe I get on occasion to be... quite offensive, really. Every body type has its flaws, even those modern media considers ideal. And I have just as much a right to bitch about mine as you do yours, thank you very fucking much. Oi.

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

No way. I totally understand your side, too. When people get all cranky at skinny people for wanting to get a little curve, I want to slap them, too.

[l-bea.livejournal.com]

Don't let the body fascists get you down. They just see a little less beauty in the world than those who haven't, you know, allowed themselves to be brainwashed in that way. Their loss, not yours! I know you rise above it.

[angelchan-2004.livejournal.com]

Ugh. I hate that. If you're happy with how you are and you're not some unhealthy weight that is hindering/hurting you, it shouldn't really matter!

It's like... my roomie's family bringing up the fact that I look like I've gained weight. That I should try to eat less or work our or something. Guys... I've gained five or ten pounds in four years. STOP IT.

[lady-kat-pluto.livejournal.com]

I have always thought you were beautiful! And your tags made my day! *Politics?* Lmao. or i some how don't understand something.

[gillian-seed2.livejournal.com]

It does seem misguided, as compliments go. I've always thought this entire thing was a scheme by alpha girls to cut other girls down with so they can stay on top.

I know a really good example of someone like that...it's the smallest dogs that bark the most, although she was mostly just small-hearted. I think she could take up an entire room with her verbal assaults.

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

I consider myself a big woman in every respect - big boned, big bodied, big voiced and big opinionated. It's not something I mind at all. I love it.

[gillian-seed2.livejournal.com]

The body standards in N. America are out of whack, aren't they. I guess any region will have its own hierarchies and problems, though... if someone is at the top of the pyramid, someone else will be at the bottom.

Too many value appearances over reality, which is why the popular kids at school sometimes lack a moral compass. They're just being praised for the impression they give off.
It's just not a culture suited to dealing with hardship. It's hard to help those in need if your parents give you everything and spoil you. The people like that, they want life to come in convenient plastic wrapping.

[amelia-seyroon.livejournal.com]

Word.

[jacobreid.livejournal.com]

I don't judge people based on their size, to be honest. As long as you're comfortable and happy with who you are thats all that matters. The only reasons I stress being a healthy weight is just for that reason: health. But being at a healthy weight doesn't mean being a super model either, right? Or being like girls on TV. Girls on TV are not exactly the best example of "healthy weight". And most definitely, weight loss from sickness is no joke.

[secondlina.livejournal.com]

Gah... This.

Personally, I don't think people should be fat or thin. People should healthy. As an example, I am basically a twig. I have no muscles. I feel a lot better during the summer when I gain muscles thanks to constantly being outside and doing stuff. As a result, I can about 15 pounds, because muscles are heavy. At the end of the summer, most people seem to think i'm fatter then usual, when really, what I am is technically healthy. And yet all I get at the end of summer is negative comments. Well, fuck you, society.

[jenufa.livejournal.com]

Well you know what I think about fat people.

OH MY GOD I HATE MYSELF SO MUUUUUCH. ;)

Brb eating some cake.

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

I want cake ;.;

[jenufa.livejournal.com]

Awww. :( Is there any kind of cake you can have without instant death?

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

You know what cake I want? Confetti angelfood cake. I haven't had it since I was a kid. I used to go insane for that cake and cupcakes, especially with the vanilla confetti icing sldgkhdklgh)

[jenufa.livejournal.com]

I'll make you cupcakes if you promise to not kill me if they hurt your stomach!

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

*eyes light up* Really?

[jenufa.livejournal.com]

Hell yeah. I've been making cakes all week because I feel like it (yeah, what, IDK I'm weird) I just need to go get a cupcake tin. Whee. :D

[yukinoomoni.livejournal.com]

dglksdhgklshdg *slobbers on you*

[jenufa.livejournal.com]

Haha. I just can't promise when right now. If I go into labour tonight, it might have to wait! :P Unless the hospital has an easy bake oven I can borrow. Hmmm.